It’s time for our new regular feature, ‘Dear Codec Moments’, where we take your questions on any and every topic and put them to a celebrity agony aunt or uncle from the world of gaming. This week’s guest agony uncle is Sam Fisher, who’s taking a break from promoting Splinter Cell: Blacklist to help ease your woes.
“Dear Codec Moments, I have recently had an argument with my best mate over some money he owes me. He says he put it in my bag the other day while I wasn’t there, but when I checked there was none. He reckons someone else must have stolen it, but I think he might be full of shit. Can you offer me any advice on what to do? Should I keep hassling him for the cash and risk losing a mate, or should I give up on it for the sake of our friendship?”
“Before you make any rash decisions I recommend you spend a little time gathering some solid intel; this is the key to successful execution of any operation. Perhaps you could hack your friend’s e-mail account; if he’s bold enough to fabricate a lie about placing the money in your bag, perhaps he’s not discrete in his communiques? Is there any CCTV where you left your bag? Perhaps you could access the recordings of cameras in the vicinity of your bag at the time he claims to have left the money. You might see he’s telling the truth and get the ID of the real thief; two for the price of one. The final option always works for me, but it’s a little extreme. Hide in the shadows and distract him into a dark corner by throwing a can or bottle; then take him at knifepoint and extract an honest answer from him, you could also get his pin number and other vital intelligence on enemy movements if you’re lucky.
As for whether to pursue the matter or let it go, answer yourself this question: If you were forced by a terrorist cell to shoot your friend at point-blank range in order to maintain your cover, could you do it? I think that will tell you all you need to know about yourself.”
“Dear @CodecMoments, should I get Magnums or Cornettos with my weekly shop on Friday? I love them both but can only have one.”
“You have to admire the stopping power of the .357 Magnum round, and the accuracy granted by the extended barrel on the revolver make this a formidable weapon; trouble is, it’s loud. I don’t know anything about the Cornetto personally, but if you can equip a silencer and reduce the muzzle report for when you’re up close and personal, then is gets my vote.”
“Dear Codec Moments, I have this guy who works for me who I respect, but has a habit of breaking the rules and getting me in trouble. I feel like if I don’t do something about it he’ll be the end of my career. I wouldn’t mind if it was just using the photocopier every once in a while to take home recipes, but it’s usually something that affects my international counterparts and there’s always a big mess I have to clean up. What do I do?”
“There are two ways to deal with this kind of situation; the first is to have a frank and open discussion, and talk about the way that the things he does make you feel. Remember that honesty is key to mediation and perhaps you can and find some common ground to lessen the distance between you: Maybe you both enjoy golf; perhaps you share an interest in photography; possibly you faked his daughters death to take away the leverage an international terror organisation had over him? The second way involves a swift firm thrust with a combat knife between the ribs.”
Horrific. Sam Fisher stars in Splinter Cell: Blacklist which will be released on 26-Aug-2013 in the UK.
‘Dear Codec Moments’ will be back next week with special guest agony aunt, Meryl Silverburgh from the Metal Gear Solid series. If you have a question or dilemma, get in touch using the form below or by tweeting @codecmoments with the hashtag #DearCOMO.