...or: How I learned to stop worrying and love tin cans in a trolley.
Live. Die. Repeat.
All aboard the future of decision making.
It's all downhill from here.
He just couldn't physically fit any more games in this week.
It feels like it should be all about Metal Gear with cardboard boxes and freezing featuring heavily this week.
Cops, Tanks, Shapes and Aliens all get reviewed this week.
Being on the wrong side of the law doesn't pay.
It's a titanic battle for the god of hack and slash games this week. There can be only one...
Put on your skid lid and open the throttle.
Built for speed.
Planes, flames and automobiles.
Time to break out your best pirate impression and get ready to sail the oceans in Sea of Thieves and Assassin's Creed: Rogue Remastered.
A damp squib of an end to the Wolfenstein II story... should have fed it to Kirby.
Take 'em down or get taken down.
A whole lotta Bayonetta going on.
If Chinese military history is your thing then read on.
Both will make you cling on for dear life.
Quick bout of fisticuffs anyone?
As well as Wolfenstein DLC, this week sees reviews of Dissidia Final Fantasy NT and Asemblance.
Anyone'd think Capcom had been busy.
This week our resident gaming journo looks at Resident Evil Revelations on the Switch and Dragon Ball FighterZ.
Don you slacks, sports coat and smartest hat, it's time to pound the streets of post-war LA.
Time to eat cake and toast one of the UK's gaming powerhouses, Rebellion.
It's a quiet start to the year.
Have any of your favourites made his list?
It's Christmas so let's forget festive and go for violent and scary.
The publishing powerhouse continues to rile up gamers.
There's definitely an Egyptian vibe this week, wonder if Stuart's gone native?
What's on your list this year?